As far as building your relationship goes, there are a heck of a lot of things (like kids and work and sometimes family) that seems to just get in the way. But instead of trying to juggle it all, prioritize doing the following eight things together annually to help your bond—and couple connection—grow.
Just like growing a seed into a plant takes time and patience, you have to find time in your life to grow your relationship too. Things will change between you over time, it comes with the territory of marriage and kids, but making duo time just for you with no distractions, will bring you back to the place where it all started. Learn these easy 8 things to do as a couple to build your relationship. Read: Find Life Balance in your Marriage with your Husband
8 Things you must do as a couple each year to build your relationship
Break Down Those Finances
Sure, nobody really enjoys talking about money, especially couples. But in order to be successful together, you both know the ballpark balances of your investments and 401(k), but planning a conversation that’s a deep dive into your bottom line is a smart idea so you can stay on the same page about short- and long-term financial goals. It also affords you the opportunity to recalculate if something (like your emergency savings or kids’ college funds) is running low. This might be the hardest conversation to have at first, but I promise you it will get easier and both of you have the right to know how you are planning for the future.
Check out my monthly budget sheet if you need some help getting started. I suggest that you complete it together so you both can have a reality check of how much things cost and where your money goes each month.
Don’t Harbor Negative Thoughts
For the love of Rodger, if your husband doesn’t learn to load the clean his sink properly after brushing his teeth, you’re going to scream. OK, now you’re screaming. It’s not only cathartic, it’s good for your overall relationship health since, eventually, you’ll have to hash things out and reach a compromise. (Hello, growth.) Somethings simply have to be out on the table or the internal anguish will slowly eat away at your relationship by turning into resentment. We all have faults. Find ways to deal.
Make a date with a new couple
That new mom and dad you traded numbers with at a friend’s party last week? Give a double date a whirl to see where it leads. If you hit it off, score. You have new—and nearby—friends to hang with. If it’s awkward, oh well. You don’t have to besties with them. Sometimes stepping out of your couple comfort zone can be the best thing for both of you! What’s the worst that can happen?
Find a show to binge watch together
Because we all know the best weekends are the ones when not even a Saturday afternoon yoga class can you tear you away from all ten episodes of Pretty Little Liars. This is one of those of those things where you need to find a show for BOTH of you. For my husband and I, we got into some crazy dark shows like HBO’s Game of Thrones or The Ozark’s on Netflix. Find a show, get your kids to be, have a cocktail and enjoy watching something together! Read: 15 Powerful Texts To Connect To Your Husband At Work
Book double doctor appointments
Your physical happens once a year. Remind each other to get it on the books, so you’re both keeping tabs on your health (and neither one of you has to nag). This seems like an easy one, but you may possibly be the worst and taking care of yourselves. Make the appointment and get it done, then celebrate together after… Victory! You are still healthy!
Clean out the closet together
He has 147 T-shirts. You have 13 pairs of leggings in varying condition. Do each other a favor and book a weekend to weed through together. (Trust us, the extra closet space will benefit you both.) Work on making piles of keep and don’t keep. It is way more fun to do this together than alone because you can really gage what your partner thinks about some of those ‘must have can never throw away’ items. Better yet, pack it all up and donate to a local shelter that needs clothing. It will make you feel good.
Call Out of Work
No one has to know that instead of nursing a cold on your couch, you’re on a road trip to check out a craft beer brewery two towns over. Everyone needs a mental health day, if your mental health includes your partner, then make sure that you make time for it. Obviously don’t over do it (because you might get fired!) but if you need to take a personal day, take a personal day and have no guilt about it.
Make a date night on a non date night
You don’t have to break the bank, but treating yourselves to a night on the town—a fancy dinner, dancing or, heck, a weekend away—can be all it takes to recharge together and nurture your bond. Get grandma to watch the kids, book the trip and spend some time alone reconnecting. Go back to a favorite spot (we love Savannah, GA!) but also be willing to try something new. Do you need to rest and relax or are you up to explore? Even if its only one night, combine something like Dinner and Mini Golf into one outing or get tickets to see a show, got to a sporting event. Read: Find Balance: 50 Ways to Date your Husband
So now you have a eight ideas to do together each year, it’s time to make sure you get them on the calendar and plan them out. Some you will do more than others, but at minimum, make sure you build work life balance by focusing some time on your relationship. Let me know in the comments your ‘must do’ couple ideas for building your relationship each year.
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